I love you. But don't touch me.
Today people all over the world are celebrating love day. In our house it's drug day. Everyone is sick and hacking and sweating and chilling. No one wants flowers or candy. We have no functioning senses to enjoy them.
We want drugs. Lots of drugs. Off I trudged to the pharmacy early this morning to get a nice little gift basket for my love: He got sprays, pills, creams, syrups, drops... something to fill every orifice. The only exchange of bodily fluids will be whatever manages to spray all over each other when we sneeze. Ah, love.