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Showing posts from March, 2010

I'm just sayin' ...

Okay, so my previous post was unfounded. It did make for a funny story though, so I left it posted with follow-up note explaining the situation.

As most of you know, I have trodden a well-worn path to the snopes.com site. I live in fear of spreading false rumours by invading every inbox I have access to with a story that is simply just not true. It's just a thing with me. I don't know if this fear can be attributed to my honest God-fearing character who wants to stand up for truth and justice or if I simply hate being wrong.


Somehow, we've come to accept "saying" things in cyberspace that we wouldn't possibly dream of voicing in words and actions. Imagine the following scenes:Would you meet me at Save-On Foods if I phoned you up one day to give you a special once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to get wealthy. If I told you that Jimmy Pattison (I don't even know if he still owns SaveOn so don't get excited) was standing in the parking lot and every time someo…

I caught me a leprechaun.

This is a true story.

And while I do not personally know the characters and I heard the story third or fourth hand, it's far too hilarious not to share. I mighta made up the guy's name too, but the story is true.

Jimmy has Down's Syndrome. He's a large young adult who, though unable to hold a job, is capable of staying home during the day while his mother teaches at a local school. He knows the rules: do not phone mom at work unless there is an emergency.

One day last week, just after St Patrick's Day, mom's cellphone rang in her class.

"Mom!" she heard when she answered, "You have to come home. I caught me a leprechaun!"

Mom did her best to settle Jimmy down and explain that all would be fine until she got home after school.

But after the third or fourth call in a very short time exclaiming that she really did have to come home cuz, "I caught me a leprechaun!" mom decided she'd better abandon her class and make the quick trip home t…

Whining about the wine.

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Our anniversary was a few weeks ago. My husband and I are coming to that time in life where we need nothing, and anything we want is far too ridiculously expensive to justify as an anniversary or birthday present. And so rather than accumulate more stuff, gifts are best when they are consumables.

And so, for our 28th anniversary my husband received from me 3 bottles of wine. Anyone who knows me, knows I'm always on the lookout for wine with interesting names or labels. The only requirements: It must be red. It must be less than 20 bucks.
Occasionally, even though we don't usually drink white, I splurge and get one if it has a real cool name or label like Cat's Pee on a Gooseberry Bush (thanks to Kore for that recommendation)

Here's what Alb got for our anniversary:


The note attached read "You are still my first love (primoamore) even though somehow your virgin has turned into a bitch." Well, this was all fine and funny until he put the bottles away in the cabine…

I hereby do solemnly swear...

Here I am.

It amazes me still that I get an average 30 or so readers at my blog each day. Especially so, since I've really dropped the ball in recent months. But I plan to make a comeback.

Here's the story: my computer is located in the geographical center of my home. I find it difficult to write or stay focused if there is anything going on at home. I love a nice quiet evening where I hear nothing but the tapping of my keyboard and the clicking of the ultra-loud-$5.99-clock from Walmart that hangs on the wall behind me. These times have been rare indeed in the past year. But all that changed about a week ago.

A week?? You exclaim. A week of quiet evenings has gone by and I've yet to blog??

Well yeah. The other requirement for writing is that I have to feel a little bit humorous as well. I don't want to come across as simply complaining as I broadcast the events of my life across the vast expanse of cyber space. I strive to be entertaining and complaining. And this past we…

I want my own exoskeleton.

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Can a person be allergic to their own sweat?

This question has come in to the forefront of my mind in recent weeks. I'm having hot flashes and night sweats, but I can deal with them. However, when they are followed up by insane itching I simply want to create an exoskeleton by crawling out of my own skin like a snake or a crab.

A few weeks ago I had the thought maybe I was having a reaction to all the medications I'm taking. I'd run out of my blood pressure meds so I quit taking all my pills cold turkey. Smart? No. Successful? No.

Last night I flicked on the TV in the midst of a Menopause seminar on PBS just as a woman was talking about itchy and "crawly" skin. Huh? How can I have been researching Menopause and hysterectomies for a year and not have known this side effect? Perhaps I read about it and didn't take it seriously because it sounds insignificant compared to talk of hot flashes, sex drive, osteoporosis and depression. Insignificant it is not.

I barely t…

There was none other quite like her.

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I am not an animal lover. Truth be told, I'm really quite afraid of dogs - even ones I know.

In the early nineties we decided once Ryder, our golden retriever, was gone that we would remain dogless and put up with the cat only because she was a very good cat who required little maintenance, and she was much more lovable than the mice that are inevitable when you live on acreage.

Then came Jed.

Our special needs son has always had items of obsession. Over the years the objects of his obsession will change and vary, and have included things like flashlights, calendars, uniforms of any sort, West Jet, paper (flyers, newspaper, catalogs) bears and the Colorado Avalanche.

From birth to teen years his list of favourite items always included dogs and policemen. When he was 8 years old we decided maybe having the responsibility of caring for his own dog (a real one, not just his collection of 327 stuffies that all had names, family groupings and he slept with and all smelled like pee) he woul…