Return to Vegas

"Amazon Queen." 

I'm sure my hubby has nothing but love in his heart when he refers to me with his favourite endearment. 

Occasionally I feel a wee bit of guilt shopping online.  Y'know, not supporting local and all that. 

But honestly, if I want handcrafted stuff sure, I buy local.  But most everything else comes from the same shop in China anyway.  

It still kinda boggles my mind that I can pay ten bucks a month and get endless deliveries to my door within days. Sometimes ONE day.  I ordered a watch charger yesterday.  Got it at breakfast today.  

It would cost me a lot more than 10 bucks a month to drive to Walmart for the number of items I get brought to my door. And Walmart is within walking distance of my home. 

Part of my Amazon Queen title includes not being above returning even minor items if things aren't right. 

 A few weeks ago, we needed size 2025 button batteries for something.  A 4-pack was $17.99 at the grocery store.  I refused.  

I came home and ordered them from Amazon (yes, same brand) for $8.99. They arrived within 48 hours. But they in fact sent me size 2032 button batteries, which we already have a large number of. 

Jim's inclination would be to suck it up and go back to Superstore for the $18 pack.  (Actually, that would have been his first option :D ). 

But not me.  I immediately started the return process.  I figure there are too many people in the world who would just brush off the shoddy service and take the loss, while Amazon pads its ultra-billion dollar empire. But not on my watch!  It's up to me, the Amazon Queen, to teach them a lesson. When I order 2025 batteries, they best be on their game and send 2025 batteries.  

And as occasionally happens, they told me to keep the 2032's and they'd send out the 2025's. Which arrived in 48 hours.  Bonus. 

Two weeks ago, we had my teenage grandkids for 8 days, while their parents went on their first-in-15-years alone vacation. Which meant me driving them to school.  The said teens do not have their own phones yet, so I turned to Amazon to deliver $11 alarm clocks for their nightstands. Turns out the "alarm" clocks were simply digital clocks. No alarm involved.  

Six clicks on the website had return labels printed. And as soon as I drop the cassette-tape size package at the post office, my Visa gets a twenty two dollar credit.  

Seriously.  For $22 I had two digital clocks driven 1500 kilometres from Langley or Richmond or wherever, to my door and back. And the money is refunded to my Visa.  How does this even work?!?? And Amazon is for sure not losing money.  

These seem like such trivial returns. 

But I think today wins the title of most ridiculously small return. 

Enter one single eraser. 

Yes, today I am returning one 45 cent eraser all the way back to Las Vegas. 

 I ordered a 24-pack of kneadable erasers for $10.89. Free shipping. These were for use in the Watercolour Wine and Paint nights that I teach. 

The delivery arrived this morning.  The approximately 10x18 delivery package felt practically empty when picked up.  Inside was ONE eraser.  I got one eraser for $10.89.

Eleven bucks isn't that big of a deal. Could I just let it go? Yes, yes I could. Am I willing to? No, no I am not.  

It's not really even about the money. I need the erasers. 

So I started the process of complaint hoping they would just send me the other 23 erasers. 

But that is not a clickable option. 

My only option was to request a refund due to "product not as described."  

I'm not sure how I am supposed to attach this 4x6 return label to this 1x2 eraser. But I am the Queen. I shall reign.